blogs are for people who like to complain.

i can tell you right now that, even though my life is extremely up and down right now, church has really been helping me stay positive.

these past couple days have been pretty tough. i haven't missed joe much at all until lately. i just miss having him around, not so much our relationship. i miss my best friend.

i have been spending too much time with curtis which has resulted in me figuring out for him that i am a rebound. i don't even know what he is for me. hope for something new to come along? a confidence booster? i have no idea. i like him and he is really easy to talk to. i just talked to him for about an hour and a half about what he really wants in life, specifically concerning me/him/his ex. he wants her. i feel like he will come to me if he finds out he can't have her. i'm sick of being plan b. i'm sick of helping people figure out that i'm not right for them.

i want to be in school. i want to be doing something. i want to not be working at a pizza place. i want to see people more often who i know really care. i want things to be easier. i want to be out doing fun things like i'm supposed to be. these are the best years of our lives, folks. so let's go out and do something! plan a game night or go somewhere or a road trip or whatever the fuck else i'm supposed to be doing.

i want to have fun. i miss doing crazy ass shit with crazy ass folks.